To say that life abroad is all happiness, travel, delicious new food, cultural revelations, and new amazing adventures would be a complete lie. This week, I find myself to be pretty exhausted. Teaching in and of itself is a tiring task. On top of that, I spend almost all day in my second language, which requires extra thought and results in mental exhaustion by the end of the day. I try to navigate cultural differences in the classroom, with the daily realization that classroom management and instructional strategies used in the United States do not necessarily cross cultural borders. I navigate different weather conditions, which in Quito that means always carrying around sunglasses, a hat, sunscreen, a rain jacket, a vest, and rain boots. Somehow in Quito, you can be simultaneously shivering and then you get home and realize that the sun has burned your face off and now it’s storming. I feel the anxiety of not knowing if my interactions are culturally appropriate, knowing that I inevitably make mistakes in this area, and I cannot control how I am perceived. I miss my Indiana home, not constantly, but sometimes. I miss my family and friends that know me so well and the comfort and relaxation of being in their presence. When eating a food that I don’t necessarily love, or that I know will most likely upset my stomach, all I can think about is how good bagels, cookies, Reece’s, and French fries are.
In the midst of exhaustion and frustration, I have to make myself remember that real growth comes from challenges. I think back to the same exhaustion and frustration that I felt in Spain, Mexico, and Liberia and how each of those experiences resulted in a beautiful memory. I look back at each of those trips as an overwhelmingly positive experience, each with their unique challenges. I have an opportunity to choose joy and embrace the culture around me that I will be leaving so soon, knowing that when I get back to the United States, I will miss the Ecuadorian greeting (a hug and a holy kiss), fresh fruit juice three times a day, bouncy bus rides, and the amazing people here in Ecuador that have welcomed me with open arms.
I am reminded by David in the Psalms how important it is to command ourselves to rejoice in difficult circumstances. As a broken and sinful human, my initial response to exhaustion and frustration is a bad attitude, laziness, disconnection, and a tendency to criticize. However, as David models in the Psalms, God has given us the ability to tell ourselves to rejoice instead of letting frustration take over, and praise God that He has given me so many reasons to rejoice.
Psalm 42: 5 Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.
Here are some reasons I have been rejoicing lately:
1. The mountains
I have never lived in a city with a clear view of the mountains. Since day one here in Ecuador, I have felt so blessed to finally have that experience. They are absolutely beautiful, and I don’t think I will ever get tired of the view. There are so many verses in the Bible that use the mountains to make comparisons and illustrate different points. In the past, I have been able to imagine a mountain when reading those passages. However, now that I live between mountains, I see that these verses do not just serve as beautiful imagery. For those who live around mountains, they also serve as a reminder of different biblical truths throughout the day. One of the first verses that I read upon getting to Ecuador was Psalm 125:2 which says, “As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the LORD surrounds his people both now and forevermore.” As I glance at the mountains, which happens several times throughout the day, I am reminded of this truth, that God surrounds me, and His beauty and strength are even so much more than the mountains that I see.
2. The preschooler on the bus
One thing that I notice about Ecuadorian culture is a clear outward expression of love. This is clear between friends, but even more between family. I ride the bus to school every day with students of all ages from my school. There is a little preschooler whose stop is right after mine. His mom walks him out of their apartment each day and lifts him onto the bus. As the bus chaperone helps him put on his seatbelt, he always yells something to his mom like “Mamá, te amo mucho” (Mom, I love you so much) or “Pero mamá, te extrañaré mucho” (But mom, I am going to miss you so much). His mom yells back something similar as the bus door slides shut and we continue on our journey. Every morning, I look forward to hearing what the little preschooler is going to yell out to his mom. I really admire this part of Ecuadorian culture, and it is such a privilege to get to observe and participate in it.
3. Meals in community
I grew up in a great home in which gathering around the dinner table was an anchoring habit almost every night (shoutout to my mom, you’re the best <3). In college, especially during Covid, I really got out of that habit. Instead of treating food as a gift from God, to be enjoyed in the community of others, I spent a lot of time eating as fast as possible to get to class on time or mindlessly eating food while watching Netflix. Over the past year, I have been valuing the gift of mealtime with people more and more, giving myself more time to eat with others and treating it as a daily rhythm of rest. Thankfully, here in Ecuador, I don’t have a choice to eat alone. I eat almost every meal with other people, and I absolutely love it. It is amazing how refreshing a good meal can be after a long day. The other day, my host mom made apple pie and I just about cried. On top of that, the teachers I work aside often bring food to share for breakfast and they love watching me as I try new things like Chinese cherry jam (which is absolutely delicious). I eat a lot in Ecuador. Breakfast is normally a piece of fruit, bread, juice that is blended fresh every morning, and coffee. There is a hefty midmorning snack served at school which follows a pattern each week. Monday is sandwich day, Tuesday is some sort of starch and meat, Wednesday is sweet day, Thursday is traditional Ecuadorian food day, and Friday is some sort of fun food like chicken nuggets or hot dogs. A little later in the day is a fruit break where I discovered my new favorite fruit, tied with mango, called granadilla. After school, I eat lunch with my students. Some of them have made a rule that they have to talk to me in English during lunch and if they don’t, the others will playfully hit them. Late in the night, I eat a dinner snack which is normally soup and a little cheese toasty. Eating good food with others is such a big part of Ecuadorian culture, and it is a value I want to take with me wherever I go.
4. Time to rest
Although there are a lot of factors that make me really tired by the end of the day, I am very grateful that I get time to rest. I really feel like I am working hard and resting hard. Every day, I have at least two hours on the bus of downtime and about two hours in the evening most nights to relax. I don’t have any responsibilities to do laundry, cook, or clean. I realize that this might be the last time in my life where I have this much free time. With this new free time, I am trying to fill it with high-quality leisure, and right now, that has been reading. In the five weeks that I have been in Quito, I have read 13 books, which is more than I’ve read in a long time. I have been really grateful for the opportunity to read and learn more through books. Here have been some of my favorites:
Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
Becoming Free Indeed by Jinger Duggar
My Morning Routine by Benjamin Spall and Michael Xander
Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus by Nabeel Qureshi
Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley
5. The kindness of new friends
This is my third time going to another country for only two months. Speaking from experience, it can be really hard to feel part of a community in so little time. Even so, two months is way too long to go without community. Praise God that He has given me a church to attend along with new experiences with new people that have made me feel included and involved. Just the other day, I got invited to go to a soccer game between the Ecuador and Venezuela junior national teams which was so fun. My host family has invited me to their own family and friend gatherings. I have future plans to go downtown with a friend, eat homemade ceviche with a loving family, and go to salsa dancing classes taught by my cooperating teacher. In so little time, God has given me friends and community. These friends have been patient with my Spanish, eager to teach me new Ecuadorian slang, and have loved me well.
Sure, life abroad is not easy. It can be exhausting and discouraging and there are some days that make you want to change your flight to the USA to tomorrow. Thankfully, those thoughts are fleeting because our God is constant. In the midst of new challenges, God has shown me that His love and beauty are truly present everywhere on the map.
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